I have succumbed.
I had a theme this year. Not a conventional Lakewood theme, like M&Ms, farm animals or ballerinas, but a theme nonetheless. I considered doing an anti-theme, dumping stuff in a bag and writing “Just because I have a kid, doesn’t mean I have a theme to go along with his costume – here’s some nosh that was on sale.” A little too sardonic though.
Then my sister called me up, she went shopping for costumes for her kids, there were infant costume there too.
“You want a monkey, football, or bumblebee?” In true Lakewood fashion I answered,
“Whatever’s cheapest.” And that’s how I made the most important decision of my son’s first year of life.
I then considered being a cheerleader and my husband a football player, but we didn’t plan on being kicked out of Lakewood just yet. With no real thought, I just waited for Purim to arrive, and then I figured in an act of desperation I’ll put something together for Shalach Manos.
That’s basically what happened. I was considering what baked confection I could present, when I thought of granola, but what to go along with it? Then lightening struck, and the heavens parted and an unearthly voice rang out,
“Cut them into the footballs and decorate them with royal icing, Gatorade for a drink, and Chicago Bears napkins would be a nice touch”
Really, the voice said that.
I couldn’t manage the napkins (didn’t have enough time for shipping), got football napkins from Party City though.
My next problem was what should I write in the little accompanying note? I considered writing the Purim story with football terminology (like Bigsan and Seresh threw an interception, or that Haman tried a Hail Mary approaching Esther after Achashveiroh left to clear his head), but that proved too difficult, and I rationalized, looked like I was too involved in the whole thing (I already was too much already)
Lightning struck again. And this time the heavenly voice said,
“You’re round one in the draft pick to receive Shalach Manos.”
“That’s first round draft pick,” corrected my husband. So our little note now read
“Congratulation, you’re our first round draft pick to receive Shalach Manos”
And that was our Theme-based shalach manos
Oh and I threw in some chocolate that I bought for 5 pieces for a dollar before I knew what I was doing. Everyone likes chocolate.
Hope everyone had Freilichin Purim!