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Category Archives: Yom Tov

Evolving Themes of Life

I’m going to admit to something I would have never thought possible a few years ago. Looking back, hindsight, is as usual, 20/20, and there were indications that this might happen. Of course when those “signs” presented themselves I brushed them off as “just this once”, or “it doesn’t really count”, but it does, because look at me, it’s not even Channukah, and I have my Purim theme all worked out.

There were no agonizing nights, no tongue-in-cheek non-theme thoughts, no last minute hail-mary’s, but the idea just formed, I did a quick Google search,  and voila, we got ourselves a theme. Now I have to put it together, of course, but that’s not the point. I’m no longer teasing or flirting with the dark side as I did in previous years, I fully embraced it.

This is so embarrassing.

I almost feel like a sell-out.

But really, I am so excited to put this thing together!

 
3 Comments

Posted by on December 12, 2011 in Jewish, Yom Tov

 

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Post Yom Kippur – Halting Thoughts

Some things are more ominous than others.

Someone I know house burnt down last night

 – Leil Yom Kippur.

That’s my biggest nightmare you know, being a sentimental person.

 Mementos all gone.

I’m not sure what I’m supposed to think.

Or “take away” from this.

I’m just shocked that it happened to someone I know.

Usually it’s just an interesting read in the newspaper.

And I’m thankful it wasn’t me.

Because this close,

It could have been.

 
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Posted by on October 8, 2011 in Jewish, Yom Tov

 

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Joining the Dark Side

I have succumbed.

I had a theme this year. Not a conventional Lakewood theme, like M&Ms, farm animals or ballerinas, but a theme nonetheless. I considered doing an anti-theme, dumping stuff in a bag and writing “Just because I have a kid, doesn’t mean I have a theme to go along with his costume – here’s some nosh that was on sale.” A little too sardonic though.

Then my sister called me up, she went shopping for costumes for her kids, there were infant costume there too.

“You want a monkey, football, or bumblebee?” In true Lakewood fashion I answered,

“Whatever’s cheapest.” And that’s how I made the most important decision of my son’s first year of life.

I then considered being a cheerleader and my husband a football player, but we didn’t plan on being kicked out of Lakewood just yet. With no real thought, I just waited for Purim to arrive, and then I figured in an act of desperation I’ll put something together for Shalach Manos.

That’s basically what happened. I was considering what baked confection I could present, when I thought of granola, but what to go along with it? Then lightening struck, and the heavens parted and an unearthly voice rang out,

“Cut them into the footballs and decorate them with royal icing, Gatorade for a drink, and Chicago Bears napkins would be a nice touch”

Really, the voice said that.

I couldn’t manage the napkins  (didn’t have enough time for shipping), got football napkins from Party City though.

My next problem was what should I write in the little accompanying note? I considered writing the Purim story with football terminology (like Bigsan and Seresh threw an interception, or that Haman tried a Hail Mary approaching Esther after Achashveiroh left to clear his head), but that proved too difficult, and I rationalized, looked like I was too involved in the whole thing (I already was too much already)

Lightning struck again. And this time the heavenly voice said,

“You’re round one in the draft pick to receive Shalach Manos.”

“That’s first round draft pick,” corrected my husband. So our little note now read

“Congratulation, you’re our first round draft pick to receive Shalach Manos”

And  that was our Theme-based shalach manos

Oh and I threw in some chocolate that I bought for 5 pieces for a dollar before I knew what I was doing. Everyone likes chocolate.

Hope everyone had Freilichin Purim!

 

 

 
9 Comments

Posted by on March 22, 2011 in Jewish, Yom Tov

 

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The Real Pesach Blues

Everyone wrote something about Pesach.

Most of them

a whine,

a  complaint,

a moan,

a gripe,

a protest,

an objection,

a call to arms.

 

I’m going to take the high road, and will instead make every girl of maiden status jealous.

This Pesach I will be experiencing my LAST three day Yom Tov as a single girl.

Three day Yomim Tovim are the bane of every single girl’s existence.

We do everything in our power to save ourselves from the full brunt of it. Buy dry shampoo, stock up on baby powder, tie ponytails higher than the Sears Tower, (and I’m sure everyone else can fill me in on the other methods)

But to no avail most girls succumb to the matted, oily, greasy, stringy, vomit inducing, stalks of hair.

And then we pray and wish we were married, so we can adequately hide behind a snood or shaitel.

You can’t look at yourself, you are ugly, unattractive, repulsive, nasty and NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO SEE YOU (on pain of death)

Your social life is dead.

Some lucky ones can still venture out of the house on the second day.

But by the third day everyone is sequestered together with their brother’s malodorous feet and cousin’s dry matzah breath.

There is no relief.

And this is my last time

EVER.

I think I may just savor the experience, and add it to my list of “The Joys of Being Single” (post forthcoming)

 

🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

 
7 Comments

Posted by on April 7, 2009 in Yom Tov

 

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My Happy Chanukah Post

I just ate a jelly doughnut with no jelly. It was supposed to have jelly; I was waiting eagerly for it to ooze out and me having to wipe my face, and maybe scare my niece that I’m bleeding.

 

But they tricked me, there was no jelly, and I waited and ate in vain.

 

I only eat jelly doughnuts Chanukah, they are ekildick and juvenile otherwise…I went through all the motions, but it never came, even if I bought it under the jelly premise. I listened to the sales person’s pitch and bought into the dream, now my hopes are shattered.

 

How can I ever look at confectionary sugar the same way again.

 
13 Comments

Posted by on December 24, 2008 in Yom Tov

 

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When the Relatives Came (and don’t go)

Nieces and nephews are the best thing ever. You can love them, kiss them, spoil them, don’t have to worry about discipline or consistency, and when they get annoying, you ship them back home.

 

That is unless their home happens to be yours too.

 

Comes Yom Tov and all the married siblings come over. It’s great to have the whole family together, and my niece is definitely cuter than yours, but at the end of the day…they’re not going home for another week, and I need my space and sanity back!!!

 
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Posted by on October 13, 2008 in Yom Tov

 

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Yom Kippur Elucidated

I love Artscroll. Not because of the obvious fact that when you’re davening and counting pages you get to divide the page number in half, and WaLah davening is half over.

 

I took a good look this Yom Kippur at the English translation, and you know what, the tefilos are beautiful.

 

People ask, why do we all daven the same words? How can we all say the same thing and convey our own message?

 

Besides for the explanation that same piece of music played by someone else will always be different, therein lies the difference. I want to focus on the explanation that we have lost the ability to fully express ourselves to Hashem and Anshe Knessess Hagedolah set up organized prayer for the laymen, so everyone can reach Hashem with eloquence.

 

Whenever I heard that explanation I always thought, can these same words really express what I want to say to what someone else is trying to convey? Are these words really that beautiful. I never took the time to read the English translation. Following along with the Chazzan today, I fell in love with davening.

 

Take Kesser for an example.

 

The first line, (this is from the Artscroll translation)

 

“A crown, here give You, O Hashem, our G-d – the angels of the multitude above, together with Your people Israel who are assembled below”

 

As I was reading this I got such a visual picture of what it might look like, and it blew me away.

 

And there was plain old beautiful analogies, and metaphors which I as an English teacher appreciated.

 

“A man’s origin is from dust and his destiny is back to dust, at risk of his life he earns his bread; he is likened to a broken shard, withering grass, a fading flower, a passing shade, a dissipating cloud, a blowing wind, flying dust, and a fleeting dream.”

 

I can go on and on….it was beautiful.

 

Yom Kippur was good.

And then I looked at the seating chart and saw “Please do not sit in a seat WHICH is reserved” and I cringed at the obvious grammatical error rooted in Yiddish transliteration and the fact that I noticed it…on Yom Kippur.

 
10 Comments

Posted by on October 10, 2008 in Yom Tov

 

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