Mein Leben

03 Feb

I will no longer judge those women. Those women by the dairy section piling cartons of Lebens, cheese snacks, and puddings of the sort. I used to (as of yesterday) wonder if they knew what garbage they were feeding their child. And if they didn’t, why not. And if they did, why are they still doing it.

Now I’m not a health nut. I will not send my kid to school with just carrots and rice cakes. However, they will not be bringing two snacks for every recess. I’m not against Lebens and pudding, they taste great, but they’re treats, not every day breakfast.

Today that all changed. As I passed the Dairy Section in my grocery contemplating which yogurt to buy my malnourished child, there was one of those women there. She had two boisterous brats sitting in the cart seat, one lagging alongside her, and man was she going at them. She bought 3 dozen, all neatly lined and stacked.  They looked good, I think I wanted one for myself. After I gave her nasty sidelong glances and she obliviously went on her merry way I looked at the nutrition label –just out of curiosity.

Did you know there are close to 200 calories in one Leben, and it has a 20% daily value of calcium? My kid needs calories, and calcium. I bought one, just one, to see if he’d even eat it.

Unsettled by my purchase, I planned waiting a day or two to give it to him. He found it though while I was unpacking and asked for it with a fervent,

“uuh, uh, uuuuuuuuuuh!!”

I gave it to him.

He inhaled it.

First he downed it with a spoon, (really a straw, but he got impatient that it was so thick and he had to suck for so long before it came, that he gave up and demand a spoon [more fervent “uuh, uh, uuuuuuuuuuuhhs!!), but when the spoon wasn’t adequate, he drank it, used  it like a cup. There was nothing left.

I’m torn, my kid ate, which is wonderful, miraculous really – but I really don’t want Lebens to be commonplace in my house. If I continue down this road, I’ll soon be listening to Uncle Moishy, and Morah Music, despite me having standards.

The slippery slope of parenting, I’ve only started the decent, but I think I get it. I’m only a few weeks away from buying stock in Lebens, please don’t judge me.

1 Comment

Posted by on February 3, 2012 in Humor, Parenting


Tags: , , , , ,

One response to “Mein Leben

  1. Princess Lea

    February 3, 2012 at 10:22 am

    My mother, who banned junk from the house, always says that if your baby won’t eat anything, give ’em ice cream. We avoid it because of the fat, but it does have nutrients that a baby can use. It’s technically not a “bad” or “junky” food; it’s just not slimming.

    So I do not judge. Hit the freezer section.


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