I’d Rather Live Vicariously

20 May

The  newest long-standing tradition among brides is to but of course make sure her pearly whites are in fact pearly.

 So tradition being very important to me,I started the 3 week regimen required by Crest Whitening Strips.

 Besides for its being smelly, sticky, sour, stingy, and plain old gross, I got a taste of the future.

 There is a definite fear of the unknown. What will happen,

the anxious anticipation,

navigating the new,

prepping for problems

 And I will be avoiding this sensation if I ever need dentures (G-d forbid!!) You know that video clip of the skydiving granny… I always wondered what that would be like. I can now sympathize with her.

You see, one day while wearing THOSE strips for the necessary 30 minutes, my olfactory sense detected something amiss. In a preeminent strike, it defensively made my nose sneeze.


And the strips flew out of my mouth.


I smiled politely as I peeled one strip off my mother’s shaitel, and the other off her pocketbook…Fun stuff…I can’t wait to grow up.


Posted by on May 20, 2009 in Weddings


Tags: , , , , , ,

3 responses to “I’d Rather Live Vicariously

  1. Moshe

    May 31, 2009 at 11:57 am

    Wouldn’t whitening your teeth make a lot more sense before starting dating?

  2. tooyoungtoteach

    May 31, 2009 at 10:38 pm

    Moshe: Probably, but my teeth were pretty white to start with, this is just an extra measure…but I actually copped out already, my teeth were getting too white and fake looking…

  3. Moshe

    May 31, 2009 at 11:22 pm

    Just never heard of it before.


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