Everyone wrote something about Pesach.
Most of them
a call to arms.
I’m going to take the high road, and will instead make every girl of maiden status jealous.
This Pesach I will be experiencing my LAST three day Yom Tov as a single girl.
Three day Yomim Tovim are the bane of every single girl’s existence.
We do everything in our power to save ourselves from the full brunt of it. Buy dry shampoo, stock up on baby powder, tie ponytails higher than the Sears Tower, (and I’m sure everyone else can fill me in on the other methods)
But to no avail most girls succumb to the matted, oily, greasy, stringy, vomit inducing, stalks of hair.
And then we pray and wish we were married, so we can adequately hide behind a snood or shaitel.
You can’t look at yourself, you are ugly, unattractive, repulsive, nasty and NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO SEE YOU (on pain of death)
Your social life is dead.
Some lucky ones can still venture out of the house on the second day.
But by the third day everyone is sequestered together with their brother’s malodorous feet and cousin’s dry matzah breath.
There is no relief.
And this is my last time
I think I may just savor the experience, and add it to my list of “The Joys of Being Single” (post forthcoming)