Why You Should Get Engaged, Reason #23

24 Mar

I recommend engagement to everyone.


Not for the blissful utopia that it is.


Where the entire world seems to fade away, have no significance and you seem to float along with a lingering smile.


Where you are the center and the world just revolves.


Where there is purpose to Monday and Wednesday and Friday, and any other day he chooses to surprise me.


Where the sun shines even when it doesn’t, and you get away with vague answers like, “Ummm…..”

No, get engaged because it will reveal all your social insecurities, and then trounce them!

I went to a close friend’s wedding last night. Now I don’t generally consider myself to be that inhibited,

I laugh heartily,

say what I mean,

run down Boro Park streets,

sing along to the music in stores you get my drift…

And last night I broke free. I have never danced at a wedding like I danced last night.

My friend (the Kallah) wanted to know when I turned so ________. I told her I got engaged.

I did whatever I wanted, disregarded the hierarchy of the circles (family first, then cousins, then friends, then acquaintances that have to show their face)

My other friends kept telling me to behave, but I didn’t have to, Hello, I’m engaged…it doesn’t make a difference who looks at me. They were secretly jealous that they couldn’t let go…well not really secretly, it was pretty open.

Another friend warned me to watch myself because the creepy mustachio wearing video dude couldn’t stop following me…and the camera guy got in several shots himself.

A friend of a friend who is a professional dancer couldn’t stop commenting at my skill.

And random strangers came over to tell me, how it was beautiful how I was misameach the Kallah.

I could have never done that had I not been engaged. Yes, I would have had a lot of fun at the wedding. I would have danced my heart out, because she’s my friend and I want to make her happy on her wedding day…but with inhibition, I’d have stopped and started, letting go and then holding back. I’d have been glancing around surreptitiously wondering who has potentially looking at me, what are they thinking, how much to I have to watch myself if I want to get married…

I know a lot of you out there are going, “Who cares what people think, do what you want!”…but you’re reading my blog, and blogs aren’t standard reading material for the Jewish population at large, so you’re off this bell curve in terms of standard deviation…

So yeah, get engaged. It’s so liberating…until the wedding, that is.


Posted by on March 24, 2009 in Weddings


Tags: , , , , , ,

8 responses to “Why You Should Get Engaged, Reason #23

  1. G6

    March 24, 2009 at 5:50 pm

    Love the post.
    I often wish I could dance like no one is watching 🙂

  2. chelsea

    March 24, 2009 at 6:49 pm

    What are reasons # 1-22 ??

  3. Moshe

    March 24, 2009 at 9:05 pm

    Reminded me of this:

    Live like there is no tomorrow
    Sing as if no one can hear
    Love like you have never been hurt
    Dance as if nobody is watching
    Laugh like no one is listening

  4. Princess Lea

    March 25, 2009 at 5:34 pm

    See, I didn’t get that memo.
    I went to a neighbor’s wedding and danced and boogied and clapped and sang (it helped that there was Lipa and Piamenta) and a woman was so taken with my enthusiasm she wanted my info.
    No ring on my finger.

  5. daughters in the parsha

    March 27, 2009 at 5:40 am

    kind of sad that you felt you couldn’t really be yourself until now. why? I enjoy watching how all the girls are so enthusiastic when they dance at weddings. but I’m glad that now you can release your natural free spirit when dancing

  6. Child Ish Behavior

    March 31, 2009 at 6:23 pm

    “…but you’re reading my blog, and blogs aren’t standard reading material for the Jewish population at large, so you’re off this bell curve in terms of standard deviation” hehe. I have heard that a lot. still, who cares. The standard deviation include whoever you want to put in the sample.

  7. littleduckies

    December 26, 2012 at 1:48 pm

    Why is it only liberating until the wedding?
    Or maybe I never cared about what people think, so I was never inhibited.

  8. TooYoungToTeach

    December 27, 2012 at 11:34 pm

    To be honest, I wrote this post over 3 years ago, so I don’t remember the original intent with the line “liberating, until the wedding”, but it definitely wasn’t how you understood it (although, you’re understanding is the most logical one, not the best writing clarity on my part) I think I actually meant that getting married makes you even more liberating in terms of inhibition (when you’re engaged things can always get back to the chosson…). Wow, that was really confusing, (and bad) writing on my part, thanks for pointing it out 😉


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