I recommend engagement to everyone.
Not for the blissful utopia that it is.
Where the entire world seems to fade away, have no significance and you seem to float along with a lingering smile.
Where you are the center and the world just revolves.
Where there is purpose to Monday and Wednesday and Friday, and any other day he chooses to surprise me.
Where the sun shines even when it doesn’t, and you get away with vague answers like, “Ummm…..”
No, get engaged because it will reveal all your social insecurities, and then trounce them!
I went to a close friend’s wedding last night. Now I don’t generally consider myself to be that inhibited,
I laugh heartily,
say what I mean,
run down Boro Park streets,
sing along to the music in stores you get my drift…
And last night I broke free. I have never danced at a wedding like I danced last night.
My friend (the Kallah) wanted to know when I turned so ________. I told her I got engaged.
I did whatever I wanted, disregarded the hierarchy of the circles (family first, then cousins, then friends, then acquaintances that have to show their face)
My other friends kept telling me to behave, but I didn’t have to, Hello, I’m engaged…it doesn’t make a difference who looks at me. They were secretly jealous that they couldn’t let go…well not really secretly, it was pretty open.
Another friend warned me to watch myself because the creepy mustachio wearing video dude couldn’t stop following me…and the camera guy got in several shots himself.
A friend of a friend who is a professional dancer couldn’t stop commenting at my skill.
And random strangers came over to tell me, how it was beautiful how I was misameach the Kallah.
I could have never done that had I not been engaged. Yes, I would have had a lot of fun at the wedding. I would have danced my heart out, because she’s my friend and I want to make her happy on her wedding day…but with inhibition, I’d have stopped and started, letting go and then holding back. I’d have been glancing around surreptitiously wondering who has potentially looking at me, what are they thinking, how much to I have to watch myself if I want to get married…
I know a lot of you out there are going, “Who cares what people think, do what you want!”…but you’re reading my blog, and blogs aren’t standard reading material for the Jewish population at large, so you’re off this bell curve in terms of standard deviation…
So yeah, get engaged. It’s so liberating…until the wedding, that is.