Urban Legends: Alive and Kicking

19 Jan

Everybody likes to hear a good shidduch story, so here’s a new one. You might have heard with slight modifications or variations, but this happened to my friend last night, so you’re only getting it third hand.

A shadchan called my mother’s friend and tells her that there is a gorgeous boy who is fabulously wealthy and what do you know, he’s  available. His mother wants two things for him, a raving beauty and parallel wealth. 

“Well you qualify for half of him,” I commented lightly to my friend. My friend laughed and continued.

The mother is willing to look away at my friend’s lack of means if she is a gorgeous as they say she is.

Pathetic, I know; it gets worse.

No, she doesn’t want to see a picture of her. She doesn’t want to meet her. She wants to go down to where my friend works and observe her. Beauty in Action.

 You know, my friend just might only be pretty when she’s standing still with a face forward profile. How does she look when she’s singing songs with her kids, doing arts and crafts and packing them up at the end of the day?

 And it gets worse.

 Her mother was maskim.


Posted by on January 19, 2009 in Shidduchim


Tags: , , , ,

16 responses to “Urban Legends: Alive and Kicking

  1. G6

    January 19, 2009 at 8:44 pm

    To quote Judge Judy Sheindlin:
    “Beauty fades, dumb is forever”.
    People who accept such ridiculous requirements, deserve exactly what they land up with!

  2. NMF #7

    January 19, 2009 at 9:59 pm

    Heh. Who would want such a MIL? Seriously.
    And I agree with G6. Sometimes, people have no brains.

  3. tooyoungtoteach

    January 19, 2009 at 10:09 pm

    My friend has no interest, but her mother is calling the shots. She actually told me this story under the premise of,

    “OMG 2yng2tch, I have s/t hysterical for you to blog about!”

  4. frumpunk

    January 19, 2009 at 10:30 pm

    What does maskim mean?
    And yeah, no matter how good he is it just wouldnt be worth it to have a MIL like that.

  5. Something Different

    January 19, 2009 at 11:04 pm

    Omg that is so ridiculous. I’d disown my mother if I were your friend.

    And I thought my mother was bad…..

  6. The Wandering Wondering Jew

    January 19, 2009 at 11:17 pm

    I actually had to break out my Yiddish-English Dictionary for the last word – maskim. From such, I gather that her mother agree to have her watched in action.

    I find this all very disturbing. Beauty does fade. No woman or man stays young, thin and beautiful forever. I get the feeling that the guy has a personality of a shoe brush hence the limited narrow-minded requests towards the girl.

  7. Mikeinmidwood

    January 20, 2009 at 12:23 am

    Thats going too far, it might as well be the “potential” mother in law going out with your friend to see if she is fit for her standards.

  8. Moshe

    January 20, 2009 at 12:25 am

    Her mother is calling the shots? Is your friend 16 or something?

  9. tooyoungtoteach

    January 20, 2009 at 12:32 am

    1) this guy’s mother may be calling the shots for him too. He may hate it, dunno.

    2) In some circles it’s normal for the boy’s mother to meet the girl before the boy and girl meet.

    3) My friend is 21, and well, in my circles unless there is something really weird going on, a girl or boy does not take care of their own shidduchim…it’s only in their hands once they meet, till then…they have a limited say.

  10. Anita

    January 20, 2009 at 1:45 am

    Moshe- You gotta understand, in such communities, they treat you like you’re 12 until you get married. Then they treat you like you’re 16.

    Its a great system, if you still live in a shtetl

  11. Something Different

    January 20, 2009 at 2:47 am

    Ok it’s like that in my circles too but I don’t see how the mother could agree to this. There is a difference between meeting the girl and shadowing her art work for a day.

  12. Gimme a break

    January 20, 2009 at 5:54 am

    so we have 2 crazy mothers………..this girl should put her foot down and say no, and if not should put on some wacky wig, bright pink/purple lipstick and clunky green pumps and show herself off like that……..

  13. BT Slowly

    January 20, 2009 at 6:11 am

    Wow that’s tough… But understandable.

  14. Child Ish Behavior

    January 20, 2009 at 9:47 am

    I just think it’s funny.

  15. dreamer

    January 20, 2009 at 8:07 pm

    oy vey.

  16. Mikeinmidwood

    January 25, 2009 at 6:05 am

    I told this story over to my family, and I was told that my aunts did the same to my uncles wife; and yes, she didnt like that they spyed on her.


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