PTA…Bring on the Euphamisms

04 Dec

Tonight is PTA.

I have no patience.

I don’t have enough euphemisms.

Why can’t I just tell it like it is.

“Mrs. _______ your daughter is an obnoxious brat, who makes wholly inappropriate comments in class.”

“Mr. ________ your daughter is stupid and isn’t smart enough to keep it to herself.”

“Mrs._________ your daughter talks too much and says very little.”

“Mrs. __________ I love your daughter, she’s sharp, well read, challenging, inquisitive and a hard worker. Can I take her home?”

“Mrs. ___________ your daughter sleeps through my class, but aces my tests, I get the type, but it’s a little annoying.”

“Mrs. __________ I really like your daughter, she has a lot to say to me…and everyone else around her.”

“Mr. ____________ your daughter is passing the course, but failing my class. She needs to stop eating, and making weird groaning noises when she finishes.”

Actually it’s only about three students that I have “bad” reports…most are relatively neutral; good, nice kids that I like, but nothing particular to say about them…boring. And then the handful that I’d love to tell their parents how great their kid is, but I’d sound obsessive….

What are your favorite euphemisms?

What did your teachers say about you?


Posted by on December 4, 2008 in Teaching


Tags: , , , , ,

19 responses to “PTA…Bring on the Euphamisms

  1. KT

    December 4, 2008 at 3:38 am

    My elementary school teachers always said I was shy&quiet, and that *they* would be the ones to turn me around. Luckily I grew out of it.

  2. Raizy

    December 4, 2008 at 5:33 am

    Oh, how I have always hated parent-teacher conferences. I always start off by saying “We all really enjoy having ____ in the class.” So not true.

  3. Mikeinmidwood

    December 4, 2008 at 5:53 am

    I was the one who would sleep, and ace. You dont know how much studying goes on, the night before. Then comes the cheating.

  4. frumcollegegirl

    December 4, 2008 at 8:31 am

    “fcg is such a bright girl. if she only applied her self a little more…”

    i hate the word ‘applied’

  5. manly lips

    December 4, 2008 at 12:05 pm

    “so good and sweet”
    Little did they know about Jennifer Soho!the trick is to have the innocent look.

  6. stam

    December 4, 2008 at 3:55 pm

    “Stam needs to speak up more in class” – i didnt ask questions because i didnt HAVE questions!

  7. tooyoungtoteach

    December 4, 2008 at 5:00 pm

    “TYTT has a lot of potential”

    I got that A LOT, potential is wose than apply, it has more syllables.

    I was the sleeping kid, to put it mildly. Would wake up with lines across my face and drool on my desk.

    Manly: You have Jennifer Soho? I’d love to read it again.

  8. NMF #7

    December 4, 2008 at 10:18 pm

    FCG- sounds about right.
    NMF has so much potential- if only she would apply herself more. Oh, and be more organized. 🙂
    Never learnt organization- probably never will.

  9. manly lips

    December 4, 2008 at 10:36 pm

    no- you have it…
    unless, oh right, i do have it- but you have “Harry Potter is who”
    such fun!

  10. EndOfWorld

    December 5, 2008 at 5:32 am

    hey, werent you the one who slept through classes and then aced them? haha. how’s it feel to get a taste of your own medicine. if you really wanted to wake her up, just sneak up and tap her on the shoulder.

    anyway, manly lips has it right. the trick is to look sweet and get good grades. they automatically assume that it’s not your who’s making trouble. you’d be amazed at what i was able to get away with in school…*snicker*

  11. harry-er than them all

    December 5, 2008 at 6:58 am

    rebbeim thought i was going off the derech, and secular teachers loved me.

  12. tooyoungtoteach

    December 5, 2008 at 7:31 am

    Harry: Do not even get me started on my supposed OTDness that my hebrew teachers thought I was “sucumbing” to…hysterical stories…my friends know them inside out, and everytime I tell them I get a bigger laugh.

    Manly: I caught 2 students attempting to do what we did, but they didn’t get very far (a page) and we were WAY better! RL read Harry Potter is Who recently, she was dying to know the ending… I told her that I didn’t know…

  13. manly lips

    December 5, 2008 at 12:55 pm

    those were the days

  14. The Jewish Side

    December 7, 2008 at 11:59 pm

    In 12th grade we actually had an English teacher that would write down honest descriptions of a person on a piece of paper and then give it to them at the end of the year. I remember being in 11th grade, when the 12th graders read their descriptions, go so mad and were so upset at how “mean” the teacher was. After that, by our year, she only wrote down nice stuff, without using the word “nice”.

    But as a kid I remember always looking forward to hear what the teachers had to say about me. It was always the same thing over and over. besides for the good stuff, it was always about how I have to raise my hand more, that they want to hear from me.

  15. Something Different

    December 9, 2008 at 2:51 am

    My teachers always told my mother that I am a very bright student who is not reaching her full potential. LOL. In short, your daughter is a lazy bum who never does a stitch of work.

  16. Nameless Faceless

    December 9, 2008 at 11:15 pm

    “[Nameless] is incredibly bright, but does not apply herself to the fullest potential.”

    Every term, every year, every instructor, every continent, *without fail*. They were just pissed I corrected their mistakes, read novels inside of my mathematics book, and still managed to keep a perfect GPA for twelve straight years.


  17. Nameless Faceless

    December 16, 2008 at 3:48 am

    Perhaps important to note that I did fail my first semester of university, though.

    I don’t know – maybe my teachers saw that coming.

  18. tooyoungtoteach

    December 16, 2008 at 3:59 am

    Are you saying that all us “potential” people should watch out? In that case I’m doomed (or maybe not considering that I have two classes left to my Masters)


    December 22, 2010 at 11:41 am

    my teachers could never understand how i never payed attention yet i knew everything!


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