Dating is an overdone topic, yet, everyone still wants to hear about everyone else’s rules, expectations, disasters, triumphs and frustrations in this area. I’m count myself among the everybody, and I’m gonna add my little tidbit here.
Easy ways to impress me on a date.
– Show up on time. Not fashionably late, but on time. My nerves are frazzled enough as it is, and besides I’m a Yekke born in a Hungarian/American body.
– Say Hi with a smile and don’t blush while doing it when I walk into the dining room and you see me for the first time
– Don’t open the door for me. It’s a empty gesture that makes me feel inferior in a feminist sort of way
– Make yourself comfortable, take off your hat, jacket and loosen your tie, if that works for you, but don’t sit there awkwardly with a stiff back
– Don’t interrogate me. Yes, I know it’s difficult to make conversation with a perfect stranger, but try to have some sort of segway to the conversation and a transition on subjects.
– You will not be smote out instantly if you look at me when you talk to me
– Do not ask me where I want to go. My effort was putting myself together, do your part and do a quick google search. Yes, it’s nice to give me options, but don’t make me ask for them, because we both end up looking stupid.
– When you parallel park, and are in reverse, do not put your hand behind my seat. I’m a good Bais Yaakov girl, and I get uncomfortable. Period.
– If you are tall, please watch that you don’t hog all the leg space when you spread yourself out. I don’t need to avoid playing footsie with you.
– Don’t tell me about all the other people you dated and what was wrong with them. I have no interest in the competition or really even on yenta-value.
– Please get back to the shadchan as soon as possible. I’m one of those annoying don’t eat don’t sleep type, and you make it worse when you take your merry time.
– To save grace, make up a reason that doesn’t leave you looking silly for saying no, like “We have different goals, or “she’s not frum enough”, not “She’s too smart for me.”
– Don’t prolong a date (six hours) if you have every intention of saying no. Take her (me) home and spare all our emotions.
I’m young, and my list isn’t that long…yet.