Points of View

I was faced with a very difficult decision the other day. Do I go with what I know, or do I venture out of my comfort zone, take a chance, possibly come up short – but I may be very happy with the results.

I almost went with the former. But with a little prodding by my better half, I went with the latter. I don’t know the results yet, but I’m feeling good about it.

Check it out.

My Old Glasses (That I loved, and was sorely tempted to re-order)

My New Glasses

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Good thing it was just glasses; I hate making these decisions.

I made a similar one last summer, and am only discovering now, that:

1) I made the right descion

2) Gambles pay off

3) Results can take a while – and are worth the wait

Here’s to good foresight, and happy hindsight.

College Co-dependence

I knew there was a downside to graduating; I just didn’t think it would come to bite me so fast. I no longer have the greatest excuse ever,

 

“I’m sorry I can’t, I have work for college.” 

 

This works on everything. People don’t excuse work “work”. They’ll say you’re working too hard for nothing.

 

But college, it’s a noble thing to further your education and advance your knowledge and opportunities. Working hard and being dedicated to college is very admirable. And I took full advantage of society’s perception in this area. Whenever someone proposed something that I didn’t want to do, but didn’t want to seem mean, I just blamed it on college, whether I had stuff to do or not.

 

Tonight my mother asked me to come shopping with her…and while I didn’t go…I couldn’t use my safe excuse, I had to just be an inadequate daughter and say. No.

 

Aside: I hate going grocery shopping with my mother. I’m a list person; she’s a mosey-down-the-aisle-and-see-what-strikes-her-fancy type. It doesn’t really work and tests my kibud em tremendously, so I try to avoid the situation as much as possible.

 

See, I haven’t used the word no to express my desire to not do something in four years. I always used “college work” and everyone backed off. I was mature, and responsible, not selfish and lazy.

 

Those days are gone, so you might see be being a better person by default rather than conscious choice.

Normal is…

I was speaking to my friend, and I can’t remember the course of the conversation, but I ended up mentioning something I had heard on John Schaefer’s “New Sounds” podcast. It was at this point that my friend told me that I needed new pastimes, normal ones. No podcasts, no blogging, mo more drawing on my walls, or researching random topics, like the origin of tea bags. She then laid out a week’s pastime schedule that a normal person has, challenging me to follow it, for just the one week. I politely declined (well not so politely, I laughed hysterically and snorted profusely).

 

I figured though that the rest of you would be curious as to what is expected of the “normal” ones out there, so I’m posting her weekly schedule as dictated.

 

Sunday- Wake up late and go to the city. You have to go to the conventional stores, H&M, Gap, Banana, Zara’s, Ann Taylor Loft, Macy’s Daffy’s and if you can afford it, Bloomingdale’s, Saks, Barney’s, Bergdorf Goodman’s. No boutiques in the MeatPacking district or thrift shops in the village.

 

Monday – Call two friends, One married, one single, and talk to each of them for two hours

 

Tuesday – College night: So during class, text every third person in your contacts. This must be done very “subtly” with you sitting in the first seat right in front of the professor, your cell-phone hidden covertly on top of your desk. You must then glance furtively around the class, ascertain that no one is paying you any attention, surreptitiously slide your phone into your sleeve and urgently exit for the bathroom. Stay there for the next 15 minutes. (My friend couldn’t tell me how to occupy the 15 minutes, just that that was the required timeframe to be considered normal)

 

Wednesday – Go useless shopping with a friend for stuff like, shells, nail polish remover, and toothbrushes.

 

Thursday – In a public place, like the library, computer lab, or the kitchen of your house, log onto ABC, NBC, CBS, or any other network that let’s you watch previous show episodes, and watch a show. The catch being, you have to shut down the site anytime anyone gets within viewing range and open up something kosher, like OnlySimchas. My friend says this can take up to two hours.

 

Friday – Get your nails done. Wait the full 15 minutes for them to dry.

 

Motziah Shabbos – Get together with friends. Either go out to eat by Café K, Sunflower, or like establishments. Or sit in your car, outside her house for two hours talking and then go home.

 

Wow, I’m so envious of normal people!

 

What are your pastimes?

 

Do you qualify as normal?

Discounting Pride

It’s a paradox that I’ve yet to come to terms with. The people who I am secretly jealous of, but at the same time utterly mortified by.

 

Let me explain.

 

I went out to eat with my friends. I ordered a salad (very original) and she fish with creamed spinach.

 

I got my salad; it had no taste.

 

They took their merry time bringing my friend’s creamed spinach, and when they did; it was cold. My friend then proceeded to send the creamed spinach back, and then asked for a drink on the house for her troubles. And when they granted her requested, and she then realized she didn’t like anything on the drink menu, asked for a free dessert instead.

 

She got what she wanted. Good for her.

 

My salad wilted.

 

I wish I had big mouth that I could open up, demand, have no problem asking for things that aren’t coming to me.

 

I’m jealous of the audacity, the real chutzpah of it.

 

At the same time, so embarrassed for my friend. It’s so degrading asking for discounts and freebies. Be a lady. But then again, she gets what she wants and nobody looks at her any less, and I’m the one left with a lousy overpriced salad.

 

Both my brother-in-laws possess this trait of having no busha.

 

Any time they go shopping they ask for a discount, whether there is an advertised sale or not. One of them reasons that in a department store associates are authorized to give a certain amount discount, it’s worth a try to get it.

 

My other brother-in-law actually went into a suit store and told the salesperson he had a hundred dollars exactly, what did he have for him. The salesperson responded nothing, and when my brother-in-law turned to leave, the salesperson called out “Wait!” He scurried to the back and found  a gorgeous suit for him.

 

Then while he was waiting on line to pay, he saw someone he knew exchanging a tie. The store had just finished a sale where if you purchased a suit, you got a free tie. This man had bought a suit, gotten the free tie, his wife didn’t like the tie, so he came back to get a different one. My brother-in-law seeing this piped up that he had come for this sale. The salesperson informed him that the sale was over. My brother in law then said “I came in from Lakewood for this sale.” The salesperson sighed, and gestured to the tie section, indicating that my brother-in-law can have his pick of a free tie.

 

So my brother-in-law got a $200 suit for a hundred and a free tie to boot.

 

I wish I could do that, but you should have seen my face when he told me the story. My mouth was agape, hands covering my eyes, cheeks burning, with embarrassment for him. He was proud as a peacock.

 

Both my sisters are mortified by their husband’s antics, and when they get into the “metziah” modes, they walk away pretending not to know them. But they get to reap the benefits, and preserve their pride; have their cake and eat it too.

 

I guess I just need to find meself a husband like that.

Emotional Dis”dress”

I believe that one of the worst feeling a woman can feel today is being cheated out of a good buy. Well, I can’t exactly say that it’s the worst feeling in terms of reality, where there’s death, sickness and tragedy all over…but those are instances were a person is expected to be overwhelmed by emotion, not feel good and the like. But being cheated out of a good buy, is well…to put it mildly, very disappointing.                 

For most women, shopping is one of, if not their favorite pastimes. A woman shops around looking for great things at great prices (meaning cheap, or relatively), and when they don’t get it when they can, it’s very distressing.

To give an example: Say I bought a pair of slippers for $30, I love my slippers, they’re really cool, then two weeks later me friend calls me and say

“oh y’know your slippers, I just got them, for get this, 15 dollars, half price.”

All of a sudden, your slippers are ugh, Like they weren’t worth it. One because, they don’t feel their worth anymore; they were selling them for less, so they must not be worth the money you paid, so you were in way ripped off. Nobody likes that; it makes them feel stupid that they didn’t know better. And two they feel silly, like,

“Oh I should have waited two weeks, but no, I had to get them then…” and you feel like you’re a lousy shopper. It’s as though you can’t shop well.

Now think of it this way. If you love to shop, then you hope you’re good at it. People generally like to be good at something they love, but if you didn’t get a good buy (it might have been a good buy, but there was a better one) then you’re not good, or not as good as you thought or hoped to be with something you love.

Another thing is, as I’ve mentioned before, people are expected to be upset and emotional when someone dies, is sick etc. These people are expected to display extreme emotions of crying, weeping, shrieking and the sort, so they can express themselves fully. Most people understand and can sympathize with those emotions.

Then you have a person who got the raw end of a deal (like they bought too early..) If they would get all distressed about it, more than a small lament, people would think them insane. Like they had no life, substance, depth. So you have this emotion, that you can’t express (unless you don’t mind being looked at as though you’re a complete airhead) it’s all bottled up, and it just makes you feel awful. And that is why I believe bad buys are one of the worst emotions experienced by woman these days. (Sad and pathetic, I agree, but true in any case)