Husband Hashpa’ah #2

It’s terrible, since I’ve written the last post, I’ve allowed myself to speak a much more yeshivishe sprach than before. It’s like now that I’ve let the world know that I’m making fun of it, I can say whatever I want.
In any case, here’s Part 2
Part 3 after Yomtov!
Feste – She was wearing [...]

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Everyone Loves a Conspiracy

There is a Jewish Price Gouging Bedroom Set Conspiracy.
The average Jewish newlyweds purchase 48 inch beds. It’s in between a twin (39”) and a full (54”). Since two beds are necessary for the master bedroom, a lot needs to be taken into consideration. Not all rooms can accommodate two full beds…and furniture, or even room [...]

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My Mama

I went to Kever Rochel the other day. It was an interesting experience.
I was having a difficult time relating to the whole “Mama Rochel” thing, when I can just go “Tatte” at the Kosel.
And then I got it.
Me by the Kosel, is a student talking to a teacher.
Mama Rochel is a mother talking to the [...]

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Kusher Kusher Kusher

I am brilliant. Just so you know.
 
My father is a bit machmir on things, like girl’s tznius and kasharus.
 
For tznius, I’m talking about activities: we don’t go to concerts, go biking, ice skating and rollerblading.
 
Kasharus, we don’t eat most meats or lettuce.
 
I’m going to my sister for Shabbos and Florida next week.
 
I was speaking [...]

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How to Know If You are a Close Friend of the Kallah: An Annotated Guide

 

You arrive early for pictures – You show up early ooh and ahh, and after everyone else is done take two pictures with the Kallah:  one nice, one funny face. They will never make it past the proofs. 
You get dressed in the bridal suite – You have no real pressing need to get dressed there, [...]

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The Deception of a Crisis

I’m curious if this “law” is a phenomena exclusive to the Jewish Shidduch Dating system.
 
If a girl needs to lose 2 pounds quickly, just get her a date.
 
And if she needs to lose more weight, give her 3.
 
This works for up to 15 pounds.
 
Truth be told, I think this is the real source and reason [...]

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The Right Rebel

I was discussing the concept of the past with my students.
 
I opened the floor for comments on how my students think they should perceive and respond to the past. I called on one student and she said.
 
“Umm…is this my perspective or the Jewish perspective?”
 
She said this lightly, with a wry smile, but she was [...]

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Proselytizing Productions

My schools production was tonight. It was actually quite cute, tons of great musical numbers taken straight from the best of Broadway…
 
…so let’s break it down…
 
Choir – the choirs were gorgeous, had great interesting harmonies, the soloist were good, except for one kid who obviously took voice lessons but hadn’t mastered the art yet as [...]

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Definitive Drinker

I’m turning 21 in less than 2 weeks
 
Yay, Happy Birthday to me, blah blah blah, you couldn’t care less.
 
So I was talking to my friend (whose 21st b-day is a few days after mine) and was lamenting the fact that 21 is considered this big official number and we can DRINK in the non-Jewish realm, [...]

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10 a day Daily

A writing teacher once suggested that I write down 10 observations daily to develop my “Writer’s Perspective”.  So here are today’s observations
 
1)     I am terribly unphotogenic
2)     The cello sounds incredible cool, as an instrument and as a word
3)     I have developed bags for the first time in my life.
4)     I’d rather have clammy hands [...]

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