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Information Overload

Matt.Scott Thinking

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It’s a phenomena no one has ever been able to explain to me, but everyone believes it.

You know when you learn a new concept you never heard of before, then all of a sudden it keeps popping up in different areas in your life…where was it before?

Or you haven’t thought about, or heard from someone in ages, and then wham, the next few days they seem to crop up in surprising places, and you’re suddenly on overload from this person.

I can recall the first happening many times, just can’t remember any specific example other than one in 4th grade. Our teacher taught us that bon appétit meant good appetite, or enjoy your food. I was fascinated by the French words, and wanted to impress my family with my newfound sophistication. I was disappointed though because as my mother served supper that night, she said something she never did before – ingenious guess on your part in you thought she said “bon appétit”. So that was the phenomena presenting itself as a concept.

But I had the latter situation, with a person just over Shabbos and Sunday. A friend, we’ll call her Shprintzy, that I haven’t heard from or thought about in eons, came up by the Shabbos table. Or actually her brother did, apparently he’s friends with my brother in laws friend and my brother in law mentioned something that my friend’s brother did, which reminded me of my friend (hope you’re not getting too confused with the friend’s of friend’s).

Then on Sunday this friend actually called me.

And then later Sunday night, I was talking to a different friend, and she randomly asks me,

“Have you spoken to Shprintzy lately?”

Seriously, what is up?

Have you ever experienced this?

 
4 Comments

Posted by on June 21, 2011 in Musings

 

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How To Become Popular

Me: I got three phone calls about you in two days! Is there something about turning 23 that makes you more dateable?

Happy Single Friend: Ye, people feel guilty to make me sound less than perfect

 
1 Comment

Posted by on January 26, 2011 in Shidduchim

 

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Disengage

I’m writing this piece on behalf of my friend who would like this to serve as a public service announcement.

 I’m talking to you single girls out there (and I suppose myself), who intend on getting married through the shidduch dating system, and to engaged girls who are doubting their sanity.

 Engagement is not the blissful utopia everyone makes it out to be. It is a façade and institution foisted on single girls by married people, because if people really know what it’s like to be engaged, no one would get married.

 Ok, I’m talking very cryptically and ominously, let me put it in simple words.

 In shidduch dating, you know the guy ranging on average from 7-12 dates, and then you agree to marry him. You don’t know the guy from Adam, yet you are agreeing to cosign your life away, and you are SO happy about it. You wake up the next morning and you think.

 “Oh My God, what did I do, how soon can I return this diamond laden bracelet?!?!”

 And then later in the day you think,

 “Well, he’s kinda nice…and cute…and I sorta like him in a first impression type way…”

 And you’re ok for the time being.

 And then you go shopping with your mother, and she is all serious educating you on the different styles of linen, thread count, pattern blah blah blah, your logical brain once again rears and you respond emotionally (you are a woman after all) and want to start bawling and throw a tantrum.

 So yeah, that’s what really happens.

 But what us single girls see from our engaged friends is

 “Oh My G-d, He’s so cute…he told me…I bought him…We went…I love…”

 Unless you are completely shallow and stupid and flighty and have no idea what life is about, the previous statements will an Academy Award worthy performance. There will be moments that it is truly sincere, but you really cannot let the world know how much you are flipping out, and how much you are doubting, because HELLO, you are engaged, no more crises for you. You averted it, and you are on the way to living your own happily ever after.

 So if single girls knew what engaged friends were really going through, they wouldn’t be so hasty to join the bandwagon, and therefore it is very important that this show be longest running one ever.

 I wish I could be a Romantic and say there’s something wrong with my friend, but considering her and two other friends who got married recently, they all had their fair share of “moments”, and they are all different types. And yes, some have it worse than others, but everyone has them…and you will most probably still go through with the marriage and will most probably be happy and wonder years later what you were thinking…but during the engagement you will be a nervous choleria.

 So if you’re engaged, just know you’re normal and there’s nothing wrong with you. And those who still single, well, this is the picture, don’t pity yourself so much anymore and be nicer to your engaged friends.

 (I asked my friend to guest post this, and she declined…I don’t really know what I’m talking about because well, simply I’m not engaged and never was, I don’t really know the feeling. I did try some method acting techniques to put myself in the mindset though)

 
9 Comments

Posted by on January 31, 2009 in Shidduchim

 

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I Say…

I wrote this poem in response to a student approaching me about some issues she was having with friends…this poem basically takes her talking for hours on end, running around in circles, and condenses it into 4, 4 line stanzas.

I feel for her.

I say I’m not the hugging type

So if you don’t

It’s not because

You don’t want to.

 

I say I’m not the phone type

So if you don’t

It’s not because

You don’t want to.

 

I say I’m not the hang out after school type

So if you don’t

It’s not because

You don’t want to.

 

I say I’m not the caring type

So if you don’t

It’s only because

I let you.

 
7 Comments

Posted by on January 5, 2009 in Poems, Teaching

 

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Driving Home a Point

I went to a wedding the other night. This is not about the wedding, but how I got there and the wedding is just the context as to why I was in a car in this particular case.

 

The wedding was a little distance away, about a 45 minutes drive from Brooklyn. I printed out directions, and promptly left them at home. My friend brought an unreliable GPS. We got lost, paid 4 tolls for no reason.

We asked for directions.

We laughed so hard.

We banged the dashboard.

My friend, who was driving, was all anxious.

 

“My heart is in my throat, you don’t get it,” she said. “I hate driving not knowing what the next step it, I want to see ahead know what I’m doing, follow the steps, and I’ll be fine.”

 

And I thought what a great metaphor to how most of us feel sometimes about life.

 

But reflecting on the experience the way home…we made it there, we had fun, have a story to tell, made it through the bumps, the paid the tolls, and knew the roads a lot better for our trip home…so I got two metaphors for the price of one, and two perspectives to pick and choose depending on what mood life puts me in.

 
9 Comments

Posted by on December 30, 2008 in Uncategorized

 

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My Life: In Verse

I found some notes I took at a Literacy seminar over the summer.

 

The speaker had us quickly jot down where we found poetry in our lives.

 

This is what I wrote:

 

My hate the world days

Standing by a friends chupah

Insomniac night wishing I could fall asleep

The things I do to procrastinate

The silent moments between friends

The awkwardness of first impression

Taking off new shoes that hurt so much but look so good

Walking away from a tiff and coming up with the perfect retort a moment later

Watching a storm from safety of my window

Cold fingers that are outside my blanket holding my book

The anticipatory moment before I eat something

Waking up to the smell of brewed coffee

 

Where is the poetry in your life?

 
1 Comment

Posted by on December 15, 2008 in Poems

 

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In My Eyes and Heart

This post was spurred by “In My Life’s” post about not giving a guy a second date because she didn’t go for his looks.

 

My friends are beautiful.

 

Every single one them.

 

Statistically it’s a little improbable unless I make it a point to only make friends with pretty people. I’m not THAT shallow…so how do I reconcile the statistics.

 

We go to the age old adage of.

 

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”

 

This line goes past person preferences of blonde vs. brunette, blue- eyed- vs. brown eyed, tall vs. short, fair vs. dark. It goes into the very murky territory of inner beauty and love.

 

My friends are beautiful because I love them (I also think I may have defied statistics, but never mind)

 

I don’t see the extra pounds, the full cheeks, quirky nose, thin hair, bad complexion, frumpy taste, crooked teeth, bowed legs…I see a friend. That I love.

 

I know it’s sappy and corny and clichéd…but things only become that when they’re nice truths.

 

We live in a world that seeks out angst and negativity, logic and criticism as forms of prized individuality. Simple things like love, beauty, positivity are cast aside as being weak, insipid, and emotional.

 

These things will give you a lot more in life even if it not an “objective truth”.

 

So basically, don’t cast off anyone based on looks until you know them. In dating, in friends, co-workers, students, teachers….I’m sure everyone has someone in their life who have proved them wrong in this area, whether the were initially beautiful until you got to know them, or plain, but now beautiful because you know them…

 

To all my friends out there and you know who you are,

 

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL (and you know that’s a high compliment coming from me)

 

 

 

 

 
13 Comments

Posted by on December 10, 2008 in Shidduchim, Uncategorized

 

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One Good Turn

My friends calls me today; I’m just going to relate the conversation.

Me: Hey, what’s up?

Friend: I am very mad at you?

Me: Me? What did I do?

Friend: I read your post, and decided that I wanted to learn, and you know what, I’m surrounded by papers now!

Me: I’m so glad I inspired you to do something productive. Care to share?

Friend: I’m surrounded by PAPERS!

Me: Huh? What?

Friend: Papers! I took out ALL my Seminary and High School notes and I’m sifting through them. I haven’t learned a thing, I’m too busy cleaning up.

(Shuffling sounds)

Friend: Look what I just found…you wrote this after Big Bird yelled at us…8th grade dikduk notes?!?!…Oooh, this is when I was experimenting in how to spell my name…I see I reverted back the original a few pages later…

Me: Wait a minute, you have notes?

Friend: Umm…actually most of them are copies of __________ and ____________.

Me: That makes more sense. Don’t throw anything out.

Friend: WHAT?

Me: Yeah, I wanna see all my beautiful pithy comments scattered about your notes.

Friend:…fine….so you wanna be my chavrusa?

Good things come from blogging.

 
8 Comments

Posted by on December 1, 2008 in Uncategorized

 

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Normal is…

I was speaking to my friend, and I can’t remember the course of the conversation, but I ended up mentioning something I had heard on John Schaefer’s “New Sounds” podcast. It was at this point that my friend told me that I needed new pastimes, normal ones. No podcasts, no blogging, mo more drawing on my walls, or researching random topics, like the origin of tea bags. She then laid out a week’s pastime schedule that a normal person has, challenging me to follow it, for just the one week. I politely declined (well not so politely, I laughed hysterically and snorted profusely).

 

I figured though that the rest of you would be curious as to what is expected of the “normal” ones out there, so I’m posting her weekly schedule as dictated.

 

Sunday- Wake up late and go to the city. You have to go to the conventional stores, H&M, Gap, Banana, Zara’s, Ann Taylor Loft, Macy’s Daffy’s and if you can afford it, Bloomingdale’s, Saks, Barney’s, Bergdorf Goodman’s. No boutiques in the MeatPacking district or thrift shops in the village.

 

Monday – Call two friends, One married, one single, and talk to each of them for two hours

 

Tuesday – College night: So during class, text every third person in your contacts. This must be done very “subtly” with you sitting in the first seat right in front of the professor, your cell-phone hidden covertly on top of your desk. You must then glance furtively around the class, ascertain that no one is paying you any attention, surreptitiously slide your phone into your sleeve and urgently exit for the bathroom. Stay there for the next 15 minutes. (My friend couldn’t tell me how to occupy the 15 minutes, just that that was the required timeframe to be considered normal)

 

Wednesday – Go useless shopping with a friend for stuff like, shells, nail polish remover, and toothbrushes.

 

Thursday – In a public place, like the library, computer lab, or the kitchen of your house, log onto ABC, NBC, CBS, or any other network that let’s you watch previous show episodes, and watch a show. The catch being, you have to shut down the site anytime anyone gets within viewing range and open up something kosher, like OnlySimchas. My friend says this can take up to two hours.

 

Friday – Get your nails done. Wait the full 15 minutes for them to dry.

 

Motziah Shabbos – Get together with friends. Either go out to eat by Café K, Sunflower, or like establishments. Or sit in your car, outside her house for two hours talking and then go home.

 

Wow, I’m so envious of normal people!

 

What are your pastimes?

 

Do you qualify as normal?

 
24 Comments

Posted by on November 19, 2008 in Uncategorized

 

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