a discussion in class about choices,
mistakes,
decisions,
second chances,
and if you could do it over
would you?
should you?
could you?
said many students
they’d love
they’d want
they’d die
me?
not sure
don’t think
no.
wishing when it happened,
that it had gone differently.
that I said something else.
that some things didn’t happen at all.
those moments with the pause
of shame
of frustration
of desperation
smiles not meaning happiness
but, sarcasm,
but, grief
but isolation
people ask,
“Why do bad things happen to good people?”
“Only the good die young”
“She’s so sweet, but suffers so”
the unsatisfactory answer:
they can handle it
G-d loves them
it’s a test
i don’t know
if i’m a “good” person
if i “handled” it
if i’ve passed
i do know i’m here
to-day
just now
this moment
because of what
i’ve done,
didn’t do,
gone though,
all is
for better or worse,
the good with the bad
the joy in the sorrow
i am me,
because
despite
contrary
of
it
them
all
and i kinda like me.
so no,
so sorry
so, whatever.
i choose
no reset
do over
groundhog day.
